Sunday, April 6, 2008

Will the real [insert VisitPA.com team member name] please stand up...

Last year for the U.S. Open Team Relay our team out dressed the competition by miles. With the team name Three Minors and a Pedophile, and each bearing our own miscellaneous costums, no other team could touch us. At least in terms of creativity. Despite our get-up, the VisitPA.com team took the race win and forced us to take the second step on the podium. This year we upped the ante and took the costume competition to the next level. We had a reputation to live up to still more heads to turn. In leiu of last years shenanigans, Kuhn added a Best Costume Award for this years race, and we had our sights set on the 1, 2 dubb. Our idea was to immitate the exact people we were going to have to beat, to resemble each member of their team as closely as we could. Brandon kitted up, or maybe more accurately, stripped down, to be the one and only Flyin' Ryan Leech. In a last minute switch-up, Matt substituted Vegan Rob for the absent XRay Adams, and I took on the role of Zayne Braun Wes Schempf. Each of our outfits was carefully crafted using the highest quality materials available. I think they turned out pretty good.

Race Time. Lap 1: Me and Wes lead the field by a descent gap, but Wes puts about 20 seconds into me by the transition. Each following lap had more or less the same result. The real VisitPA team kept putting small chunks of time into us that just weren't able to pull back. Kyle put in the fastest laps of our team, and the race, but everytime he did we blew it and let slip away just a little bit more. In the end, we were about 5 minutes back and had 16 laps, and second overall. But......the handicap system that was put in place to level the playing field for the lower catergory teams put us in 6th place, officially. VisitPA was barely able to get in a 17th lap, coming into the transition a mere 20 seconds before the cut-off time. That lap made the difference with the point system the way it was, and they took the Team Cup once again.

Losing the actual race wasn't really that disapointing. The Team Relay has a real laid back setting to it, the outcome of the race isn't really the point. Sure, your there to race as hard as you can and try to come out to top, but it's more about having fun with the people that you spend every week trying to crush on the race course. What was devasting, however, was that the Best Costume Award, which we clearly secured at our time of arrival, was given away to another team. What?!?! The winning team wore corduroys and flannel shirts. That was soo last year.... If the award was given based on a popular vote, we most definitly would have been the undisputed champions, and in my book, we are anyway. It's a good thing there was a Taco Bell nearby to ease some of the pain...

Wes x2. Skin tones match almost perfectly...

The real Dieter covered up this time, normally he's just as scantily clad as his alias but he's always just as suave...



The amount of hair glued onto Matt's legs represents only a fraction of what is actually on Rob's body, unfortunately it's all that we had left after Brandon cut in his mullet


I wonder what we'll come up with for next year....
Fair Hill- 5 days, count it....

4 comments:

dd said...

It was best pit not best costume. The pit most likely won because they also brought the killer funk/reggea band along. And I wasn't wearing a flannel it was a tie dye. It wasn't my team that won as I was the only one on my team not in a kit.

Ry said...

Naw...you guys definitely won the best costume award--most creative, best executed. Dang, and I figured you guys were just some stupid country boys too nervous and serious to break out that sort funk! good job.
THE REAL DIETER

Lester said...

Matt looks board. and is brandon, i think that's him, trying to get onto slipstream with the handlebar facial hair?

The Matt Miller Experience said...

yeah...i do need to work on my pain face, the current one is lame- almost looks like a sleepy face